Withdrawal

Mostly, when someone dies you feel left out, as if you were not worthy of knowing all. The weight of unanswered questions nearly buries you alive. Family members are mere markers, testimonials to old tales. You finally get up and walk out.

Outside, light falls on your face, skin plum, as if nothing happened, as if you had not just experienced the deepest confrontation with eternity. Enormous emptiness fills your mouth. You tell your arms and legs to continue.

Then, when you are completely seduced by the safety of your flesh, a flash of violence takes everything you have gathered. Your hands rush to your face, your eyes wide. You begin to die too.